So burned out

Somewhere between the weekend and now, all that motivation and energy flew out the window. I still have a long to-do list, but right now I am so exhausted and burned out that even going to bed seems like too much work. I hate feeling like this because inevitably I lose my patience with the kids far too often. This evening I yelled at Shiphrah because she flung her PJ top behind the dresser while I was changing her diaper. Doesn't she know how difficult it is for me and my huge belly to lay on the floor and reach under the dresser to fish things out? Gah, I think I pulled a muscle in my neck doing it too. Speaking of changing diapers, it's looking like more and more of a reality that I will have THREE kids in diapers come July. Every time I talk to Shiphrah about using the big girl potty or going poop in the potty, she looks at me very seriously and says, "no want to poop in potty, Mommy." I suppose it could just click with her one of these days; I guess that's just what I'll have to hope for. I mean, she's not even 2 1/2 yet so it's not like she's delayed or anything, I was just really hoping to have her potty training out of the way by the time #3 came along. Diapers are soooo expensive (my husband refuses to go cloth, so don't bother suggesting that, I've already tried) and I already feel like I'm up to my arms in them all day long with two kids. I can't imagine having three. Do you think God would mind if I prayed that Shiphrah would miraculously show an interest in potty training?

It's Fiesta in San Antonio this week, so my husband is working off-duty gigs at Fiesta on both of his days off this week. They're short gigs (6ish hours) but not having him around in the evenings at all in one week is harder than I thought it would be. I guess I never realized how much I looked forward to those two nights where I'd have his help. Most mornings he gets the kids up and started on their breakfasts while I spend a few extra minutes in bed, but lately that hasn't been relaxing because the kids are loud and whiny in the mornings (we don't have a door on our bedroom so I can't tune them out). So it's like I'm super-tense as soon as I wake up every morning and that's really starting to wear on me. Why can't they wake up happy in the mornings? Anyway, all that to say it feels like forever since I've had a real break. Grocery shopping by myself just isn't cutting it anymore. I think it's been extra-hard lately because I'm adjusting to Shiphrah giving up her nap time, which means no alone time during the day. (I could get her to nap, but when she does she won't go to sleep at night until 10 or 11.) But, only two or three more weeks until our mini-vacation in Austin!!

Anyhoo, I'm going to see if I can't at least put away a little laundry before I crash. This sleepiness is so bizarre though...I guess maybe I didn't sleep as well as I thought I did last night?